A good thin mint

I can never find a Girl Scout when I need one.

My own scouting time was brief; I quit after one year. In that year, I learned to line dance to "Purple People Eater," to appreciate high tea and scones, and to glue popsicle sticks...but not to tie knots, to hike, or to use a compass. After quitting, I realized I'd cut off my pipeline to delicious, seasonal cookies sold by aspiring wilderness girls.

Even if I could find a reliable supplier*, the thought of buying a $5 box of trans-fat-filled tastiness--and the knowledge that only about 75-ish cents gets back to the local troop--cools my desire to use the official Girl Scout Cookie locator.


Decades ago, Thin Mints were made of recognizable ingredients like butter, flour, and sugar. Now....hydrogenated oils are par for the course. Even though there are "zero" grams of trans-fat per four-cookie serving, I know no one who can stop at four Thin Mints. In fact, I know people who have eaten a whole box in a day. Once, in my youth, I finished an entire sleeve in a sitting...and had a well deserved tummy ache afterward. That was a bad choice.


Heidi at 101 Cookbooks has created a fantastic recipe for healthier Thin-like Mints. Now that I've made these replicas--made of real, recognizable ingredients--I'm not going back. The next Girl Scout who comes to my door pedaling cookies will leave with a check for her local chapter.

Before you starting whipping the butter, I'll leave you one final thought on Girl Scout Cookies, from The Addams Family:

(Girl Scout approaches Wednesday and Pugsley Addams, who are selling lemonade.)

Girl Scout: "Is this made from real lemons?"
Wednesday: "Yes."
Girl Scout: "I only like all-natural foods and beverages, organically grown, with no preservatives. Are you sure they're real lemons?"
Pugsley: "Yes."
Girl Scout: "Well, I'll tell you what. I'll buy a cup if you buy a box of my delicious Girl Scout cookies. Do we have a deal?"
Wednesday: "Are they made from real Girl Scouts?"


Thinish Mints (without scary preservatives)
adapted from 101 Cookbooks

Cookies:

• 8 oz. unsalted butter, room temperature
• 1 cup powdered sugar
• 1 cup cocoa powder (use the best stuff you've got, like Dagoba or Green & Blacks)
• 1 tsp. vanilla extract
• 3/4 tsp. sea salt
• 1 cup unbleached all-purpose flour, spooned into a measuring cup (I used King Arthur flour)

Coating:

• 10 - 20 drops peppermint extract (mine came from Crosby Mint Farm)
• 16 oz. semi-sweet (or dark!) chocolate chips

1) Make the dough

Cream butter in a mixer until it's fluffy and light. Add the powdered sugar and cream some more. Add the vanilla extract, salt, and cocoa powder, then mix until the cocoa is fully incorporated and the batter is smooth. Add the flour and mix just until the dough is no longer dusty.

Turn the dough onto a piece of plastic wrap and shape it into a ball. Knead the dough once or twice before stretching into a long cylinder approximately 2" in diameter. Wrap the dough tightly in plastic wrap and freeze for at least 20 minutes.

2) Bake the cookies

Remove the dough from the freezer and let it sit on the counter for five minutes to thaw. Slice cookies that are about 1/8" thick and place them on cookie sheets lined with aluminum foil or parchment paper. Bake at 350 degrees Fahrenheit for 10 minutes. Allow the cookies to cool completely on a baking rack before coating. (I even refrigerated the finished cookies for 10 minutes to further prepare them for the upcoming warm chocolate bath.)

3) Coat the cookies

Use a double boiler (or a saucepan nested in a larger pan of simmering water) to melt the chocolate. Stir the chocolate until it's glossy, smooth, and fully melted. Stir in the peppermint extract to taste. Add more peppermint a drop or two at a time.

Drop one cookie into the chocolate at a time; flip the cookie with a fork to make sure it gets coated. Lift the cookie with the fork and gently rock the fork back and forth to drain any excess chocolate. You're aiming for a thin coat.

I used a spoon to stir the melting chocolate, a fork to coat each side and shake off excess, and a knife to gently slide cookies from the fork to a prepared cookie sheet. Despite all these tools, I still managed to coat my arms, my face, and the stove in melted chocolate. Be warned. Go slowly and use as little force as you can to shake away extra chocolate.

Refrigerate or freeze the cookies to set. Store them in air-tight containers or in thick freezer bags, refrigerated or (as I prefer) in the freezer. Makes 3 - 4 dozen Thinish Mints.

*I have since found a reliable Girl Scout Cookie supplier at work! Thank you, thank you, Colleen! You keep me in Thin Mints when I'm too lazy to make my own!

If you liked this post, you might also enjoy:

Home on the Ranger Cookies
Cherry chili chocolate chip cookies
Dark chocolate cookies with espresso

Buttermilk to go

No matter how much I train myself to love superfood breakfasts like fruit smoothies or cooked oats, I always come back to coffee and scones.


Daily smoothies would be perfect if I had a live-in Jack Lalanne to prepare my breakfast to-go. (Alas, I do not.) Also, when I cook oatmeal, even when I spike it with flax and walnuts and--let's not hide things--butter, my stomach is a screaming banshee by 11 am. I don't know if an enzyme imbalance or my bum-ass metabolism is to blame, but I do know what works: coffee and a good scone.

For me, coffee is so wonderful that I name my top six coffee-related songs with no mental prep:*

1. "Coffee and TV" - Blur
2. "Cigarettes and Coffee" - Otis Redding
3. "Black Coffee" - Ella Fitzgerald
4. "Coffee Shop Girl" - Ozma
5. "The Coffee Song" - Frank Sinatra (Soul Coughing sings my favorite version.)
6. "Starfish and Coffee" - Prince

Scones accompany coffee almost as well as cream does. Unlike giant gas station muffins, they don't scream, "Look at me! I forgot to eat breakfast." They're classy, low-key. The scones I love most come packed with flavorful treats like walnuts, spices and fruit. Also, I love that scones are easy to carry, since I never leave enough time for breakfast.

I started making scones in my College Hill Coffee days. There, cranberry-orange buttermilk scones reigned supreme. In the CHC kitchen, I learned to cut in the cold butter, to make buttermilk from vinegar and milk, and to quickly press the scone dough together into a flaky round. After slicing the dough and a quick bake in the oven, CHC's cranberry buttermilk scones often sold within a few hours.

Years later, when I was morning shift manager at a Starbucks, I'd take my 7 am "lunch break" with a foamy latte and maple-nut scone. Starbucks also carries a cranberry-orange scone, but nothing tops the ones from College Hill Coffee. Now when I make scones at home, I always use the CHC recipe as my foundation. I might swap in cranberries and lemon, or sprinkle poppy seeds on top, but the proportions are always the same as the original recipe.

I made some great swaps in my last batch of scones. Instead of tart cranberries, I filled them with soothing apricot and buttery walnuts, then swirled cinnamon and cardamom through the dough. They went over well at work. I think my boss ate three. Thanks, College Hill Coffee, for teaching me another recipe that keeps on giving.

Buttermilk scones! (the fruit + nut variety)
from the College Hill Coffee Cookbook
makes 1 dozen scones

• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 1/3 cup sugar
• 2 ½ tsp. baking powder
• ¾ tsp. salt
• ½ tsp. baking soda
• ¾ c. cold butter
• 1 c. – 1Tb. Milk
• 1Tb. Vinegar
• 1 tsp. grated orange peel (optional)
• 1 cup dried apricots (cranberries, cherries, etc.)
• ½ cup walnut pieces (or almonds, cashews, sunflower seeds, etc.)

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees Fahrenheit and line two baking sheets with parchment paper. In a small cup, combine the milk and vinegar. Let the mixture sit for a few minutes to create buttermilk (because who keeps buttermilk on hand these days?)

In a bowl, combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, sugar, and salt. Cut in the cold butter using a pastry cutter or the tines of a fork, working until the butter is incorporated with the flours in tiny pieces. Stir the buttermilk into the flours until just combined. Fold in the fruit and walnuts.

Turn the dough onto a floured surface and lightly pat and squish the dough into two 6”-diameter circles. (The less you knead the dough, the flakier the scones will be.) Add cinnamon-sugar swirl.** Divide each circle into six wedges, and brush the scone tops with milk. Sprinkle a spoonful of sugar on the scone tops if you like.

Transfer the scones to the baking sheets, leaving 2” between each scone. Bake for 15 – 20 minutes or until golden brown.

**I marbled a cinnamon-sugar mixture through the dough before I cut it into scones. I mixed 2 Tb. Cinnamon, ½ tsp. cardamom, ½ tsp. sugar, and 1 Tb. water into a thick paste. Then, I use that paste to “glue” together random chunks of scone dough before I pat it into the circles. This creates lovely ribbons of spice.



*I did not list "Java Jive" by Manhattan Transfer because I wish that barbershop quartets worldwide would retire it, forever.


If you liked this post, you might also enjoy:

Ms. Rita's banana bread
Pumpkin cream cheese muffins
Chocolate chip biscotti with orange
CHC Blueberry Muffins

Belly full of rhubarb

I was bitterly disappointed when I discovered that Be-Bop-A-Re-Bop Rhubarb Pie (and Be-Bop-A-Re-Bop Frozen Rhubarb Pie Filling) were not real items that I could purchase in the frozen section of my local grocer's store.

This happened in 2007, when I'd just begun as a part-time announcer at KMUW. Every weekend, I'd get paid to listen to Car Talk, This American Life, and A Prairie Home Companion from the control room. I caught up on the week's news with Carl Kasell and Peter Sagal. Garrison Keillor kept me up-to-date on the latest drama within the Professional Organization of English Majors and in Lake Wobegon. My listening raptures were only interrupted occasionally by the need to, you know, put on headphones and talk about weather and upcoming shows.


Within the program itself, I quickly learned that The Catchup Advisory Board, Mournful Oatmeal, and Guys Shoes were fake sponsors, but Pillsbury Crescent Rolls brought in real dollars. I wished Powdermilk Biscuits were real, for who can turn down a motto like "They give shy persons the strength to get up and do what needs to be done?"

But for the longest time, I held onto hope that I could find Be-Bop-A-Re-Bop Rhubarb Pie filling in the freezer section, sandwiched somewhere between pre-made pie crusts and Marie Calendar. I've yet to find it, but I keep hoping some day Minnesota Public Radio gets its act together and offers this product as a pledge thank-you gift. (For nothing really gets the taste of shame and humiliation out of your mouth like a slice of Be-bop-a-Re-Bop Rhubarb Pie!) Until the wonderful day I do find it, I'll keep making my own pie.


I've been holding off on sharing this recipe for weeks, telling myself "I'll share it when Portland has had at least a full week of sunny days." We haven't, and I can wait no longer. On this cloudy and cool 4th of July, perhaps you'll find this strawberry rhubarb tart comforting served warm, with a bit of whipped cream or tart plain yogurt.

Happy Independence Day to my American friends, and Happy Start of Summer to my friends who live elsewhere. While you make this tart, crank up the radio and listen to A Prairie Home Companion, or your favorite folksy music program. :-)


Strawberry rhubarb tart filling
serves 8

• 3 cups fresh strawberries, sliced (show your local farmer's market some love!)
• 2 cups fresh rhubarb, washed and sliced into thin macaroni-sized bites
• 1 tsp. vanilla
• zest of one orange or lemon
• 3/4 cup sugar
• 1 Tb. flour or cornstarch

Mix together all filling ingredients (but the flour) in a large bowl. The strawberries and rhubarb should be well coated with sugar, and the lemon/orange and vanilla well mixed. Sprinkle the flour or cornstarch on top of the filling, then mix in well.

Once the crust is prepared (below), bake the pie at 375 minutes for 50 - 60 minutes, until the crust is golden brown and the filling is bubbly in the center. Let the tart cool on a wire rack. Serve with plain yogurt, sour cream, or whipped cream.

Pâte brisée
from French by Carole Clements

• 1 1/4 cups flour
• 1/2 tsp. salt
• 1 tsp. sugar (optional)
• 1/2 cup unsalted butter, cut into small pieces
• 3-8 tsp. iced water

In a large bowl, sift together flour, salt, and sugar. Add the butter and rub it into the flours with your fingers. Slowly add the water, 1 tsp. at a time, mixing in until a crumbly dough begins to form. Don't overwork the dough or it will be tough. If the dough is crumbly, add a little more water. If it's sticky, add a little more flour.

Turn the dough onto a piece of plastic wrap. Hold the wrap with one hand and use the other to push the dough away from you until it's smooth and pliable. Flatten the dough into a round and chill for 2 hours (or, if you're in a hurry, while you prepare the tart filling.) Let the dough soften to room temperature for 10 minutes before rolling out.

Roll the dough out onto a tart pan and trim the edges. Prick the base of the dough with the tines of a fork and prebake for 10 minutes at 350 degrees. Let the dough cool before filling.


If you liked this post, you might also enjoy:

Cranberry peach salad with g.i.n.g.e.r
Three-minute strawberry salad with spearmint
Dried fruit pie